This is part 1 of my 4 part series on why we overeat when we grieve. Or, more specifically, why we have problems with weight after an event that includes major grief. I’m writing about this one first because, well, it’s my life. My life is forever changed due to infertility and subsequent miscarriages and infant loss.
There are some coping mechanisms that are pretty common during infertility/hormone treatments and also after losing a baby. One important one is drinking the empty calories of alcohol. I certainly indulged in some karaoke. Yes, it numbs you but it is true that there is never a solution at the bottom of the drinks. I looked.
Another way of coping has to do with generally not taking care of yourself and using convenience foods. Some women just get depressed and exhausted and don’t care about the calorie content and don’t get out and exercise. (If you think you are depressed, it is okay to ask for help! Call your doctor. Call your county mental health people. Just call. Or find me! I’ll talk you into calling someone professional!)
Lastly, comfort foods are usually pretty full of calories. I know that one of my favorite comfort foods was Kraft macaroni and cheese. Totally devoid of nutrition! But it made me feel full and comforted and happy for a few minutes.
I’m not trying to change the world, but I *get* that after you lose a baby / miscarry / have your 5th round of Clomid and get a BFN that you will turn to food or alcohol for comfort. All I am here to say is that if you eat something healthier half the time you might feel a little better. Comfort foods are full of chemicals that make you want more comfort foods. And they might start a trend of healthier eating. 🙂
I’m going to write a few blogs here that are going to cross over to both of my blogs. Sort of like when the kids from Diff’rent Strokes tv show would show up on the Facts of Life. (I loved both of those shows, by the way.)Something that I am passionate about is supporting grieving people. I’m also passionate about overcoming obesity. And the lack of material out there that talks about the two of them together is pretty much nil. Surprised? I’m not. Let me tell you why.
Two very taboo subjects in our culture are grief and weight. It’s only in recent years that people have started focusing on healthy grief after a loss and have realized that they have been going about it the wrong way. And with obesity, well, it’s something that no one wants someone to focus on when it is happening to them. Conversely, no one wants to focus on another person’s obesity either because it is probably going to come off as offensive.
I’m going to write a series of blogs over the next few days and what I want to focus on are four kinds of loss: loss of a child, loss of a parent, a loss that takes a long time to happen like cancer or Alzheimer’s, and a quick traumatic loss like a suicide or car accident…. or even a public quick (and incredibly traumatic) loss like 9/11. I want to focus on why we probably overeat when we are experiencing/have experienced them. I want to brainstorm ways of PREVENTING that in the future. So, in bringing it out in the open, I hope to make it less of a taboo subject and get people more proactive in thinking about how they are soothing or comforting their bodies or how they are building up a wall around themselves or how they are thinking that food is the only way to cope, etc.
I’m totally open to any thoughts or ideas about this. 🙂
Diff’rent Strokes (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
People always ask me for advice about protein shakes. The truth is, you have to find one that you like. Your tastes may change if you get the surgery. One shake that I have consistently loved is Click. ( http://www.drinkclick.com ) I’m not a big coffee fan, but this is more of a frappucino drink. You can put flavored syrups (sugar free or not, from Torani or Davinci…. or you could use those new stevia drops in there) or powdered peanut butter (PB2) in there. I put it all in a Blender Bottle and shake! My favorite flavors to put in are peppermint, coconut, raspberry, and caramel. It’s just a different drink each time!
It has 15 grams of protein per shake which isn’t a ton but it was enough for me to drink down in a half hour or so for the first year. It has vitamins and minerals in it so it helped my labwork look great, too! I went to bed looking forward to my Click each morning. 🙂
Anyway, I will probably be having a giveaway of sorts either here or on my Twitter account ( @jeepjules ) soon, so stay tuned!